"Are you a madman? This will cause an international incident!"
―Juan Francisco Valdez

Juan Francisco Valdez is a character in L.A. Noire. He is the Argentinean Consul General in Los Angeles.



Valdez met William Dewey at a bar, who offered a substantial bribe to convince Valdez to purchase one of his cars. At Dewey's dealership, Valdez met and became infatuated with one of the employed mechanics, Gabriel Del Gado. Valdez attempted to initiate relations with Gabriel, however, this would only enrage and offend Gabriel who in turn later stole Valdez's car as revenge. However, Valdez's Notebook was in the car, which had the phone numbers and characteristics of young boys, which Oswald Jacobs found.

Events of L.A. Noire

Valdez reported his car stolen to the police and demanded an "audience" with a senior detective. Detectives Phelps and Bekowsky questioned him about the car and theft. Valdez said that he wanted the perpetrator "soundly flogged". However, Bekowsky shot back by saying: "Unfortunately we don't do that here, Your Worship."

"You fuck young boys, Valdez?"
―Cole Phelps

They briefly held him incarcerated, due to his evident inappropriate relations with young boys, until his car was returned and Gabriel apprehended. Valdez wasn't charged for being a pedophile due to diplomatic immunity. However, his reputation as a pedophile was now no longer a secret.


  • "When I leave here I will seek legal advice from my government, Detective. And then I will bring your Police Department to its knee."
  • "I expect you to draw your own conclusions and to discontinue this aggressive behaviour."
  • "Gentlemen, your duty is simple. Return my automobile and thrash the perpetrators."

Case Appearances



  • Valdez resides at Suite 210, 5055 Wilshire Boulevard.
  • One notebook inactivity comment will have Valdez say that he has a cousin, Jose, who was kicked in the head by a polo pony. The pony was shot, though in retrospect, Valdez states that Jose should have been shot instead.
  • He doesn't like being addressed as "Mr Valdez", he much prefers his title "Consul General".
  • Valdez's design somewhat resembles the Juan Valdez Café mascot, which was also referenced in the film Bruce Almighty.